6 Ways To Reconnect With Your Significant Other

Whether we’ve been dating someone for one year or ten, there comes a time when we just want things to be the way they used to be.

Perhaps kids and homework and extracurricular activities and in-laws and Monday Night Football (!) have gotten in the way of your relationship lately.

So, how do you get it back, the one-on-one alone time you two used to have and love? Well, these six tips should do the trick.

1. Put Those Phones Away

A few years ago, I was so addicted to texting that I gave it up. And, guess what? I am alive to tell you about it today! Giving up texting made me call people more, which led to seeing people in person more and, let’s face it, there’s really no better way to connect with someone.

So, when you find that conversations or in-person time with your SO is getting too phone-based, put those phones away and be old-fashioned: Talk. To each other. Not to apps or people’s avatars on your phone.

2. Play A Game… And Not On Your Phone

Break out the Scrabble or Uno and play a game together (no phones allowed). Just like in the olden days—i.e., before smartphones—you’ll be able to gauge each other’s facial expressions and anticipate each other’s game moves via one’s body language.

You can even add a twist to a game like Scrabble; for instance, come up with a theme or that all words have to start with certain letters.

Soon, you’ll be reminded how fun it was to sit home and think up seven-letter words. Plus, your competitive streak is bound to come back. Whomever loses has to make dinner (or you can think of your own clever punishment).

3. Cook Something… Anything

As I have mentioned in other articles, cooking together is a great bonding experience. When I couch-surfed through L.A. from 2009-2013, I’d stay with each couch host for a week, and I’d make sure we’d create at least one meal together (and from scratch, not just a box!).

There’s something about buying ingredients together, then whipping something up (heck, even making something up) that’s more fun than actually eating the food.

If you’re so inclined, invite some friends over and have a potluck dinner party, too, and make it a theme, like Dr. Who. It’s guaranteed fun, trust me.

4. Volunteer

Sure, you two may have separate interests—he has his rock-climbing nights while you have your Spin class. But, when’s the last time you had a shared interest that you did together regularly?

Whether you read to children in the hospital or volunteer at the local food bank, doing good for the community—together—will help bond you two more, as well.

Plus, you’ll meet people you never would have met before, both fellow volunteers as well as the people you’re helping. A guaranteed win-win for everybody.

5. Have A Date Night… But Not Just “Dinner And A Movie”

I know people talk about doing this, but how often do you actually do it? Exactly.

Anyone can go to “dinner and a movie,” but date night is your chance to go out on the town. You know—dress up, go someplace new, get a hotel room instead of sleeping at home, go on a mini road trip to a town an hour away… the more creative, the better.

They don’t say “variety is the spice of life” for no reason, you know!

6. Have The Kids Go Out… All Night

Yes, you read that correctly. As much as you two should go on a road trip, sans kids, you can also have them sleep at a friend or relative’s house once a week, to guarantee you a date night in (or after returning from your date night out on the town) and teach them independence.

As much as you love your kids, if you really think about it, when were you last alone in the house with just your significant other? (I thought so!) And there’s no need to feel guilty: some kid-less time is healthy for everyone.