Chrissy Teigen opened up about her relationship with her body after pregnancy loss

As open as ever, Chrissy Teigen has given her social media followers an update on her physical and mental recovery after losing her son, Jack, not long after she and husband John Legend revealed they were expecting another baby.

In an Instagram post last month, Teigen described the process as “brutal, exhausting, sad, physically challenging, [and] mentally painful.” However, she added that things were getting better.

“I already see the leaves as orange instead of grey, realized the sky is indeed blue and not black, and horn honks on my forced morning walks only bring me to my knees half the time,” she wrote.

She continued, “I can make it up my stairs only stopping once or twice instead of every other, and can get out of the bathtub all by myself as long as I have the promise John will dry me off.”

Evan Agostini/Invision/AP

This week, Teigen shared a photo of her body almost three months after the loss of her baby.

“Even though I’m no longer pregnant, every glance in the mirror reminds me of what could have been,” she wrote. “And I have no idea why I still have this bump, honestly. It’s frustrating.”

She added: “But I’m proud of where this entire journey took my body and mind in other ways.”

Teigen, who is mom to daughter Luna, 4, and son Miles, 2, said that while she’s sad she won’t ever be pregnant again, she feels lucky to have the privilege of watching her two children grow up.

Evan Agostini/Invision/AP

“I am lucky to have two amazing little ones who are transforming into big little people more and more every single day,” she wrote.

On Oct. 1, Teigen revealed her pregnancy loss on Twitter and Instagram.

“We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we’ve never felt before,” she wrote alongside a series of black and white images in a hospital room. “We were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed, despite bags and bags of blood transfusions. It just wasn’t enough.”

Teigen later got a tattoo in memory of Jack.