Moms reveal their messy homes in viral trend, hoping to normalize reality

side by side images of a woman getting ready for the day
TikTok | @heykatieejay

As much as we are fascinated by momfluencers like the mom behind Ballerina Farm, who has eight kids but manages to keep her multi-million dollar home perfectly clean and decorated without a plastic toy in sight, their lives are as unrelatable as celebrity moms who employ private chefs to cook their kids ultra-healthy meals or fly their families in private jets to vacation.

That’s why the recent trend of normal, middle-class moms showing off their real and often messy lives on social media is so appealing to many people scrolling through their social feeds, especially moms.

Dubbing themselves “non-aesthetic moms” or “realistic moms,” these influencers are committed to making content about their homes and lives, even though they don’t have wealthy lifestyles or live in large, new houses with the typical luxury look of marble countertops, modern white cabinets and stainless steel appliances.

The Wall Street Journal recently profiled some of these women, who opened up about overcoming their embarrassment to get real with their followers about their modest finances and living spaces in a quest to normalize middle-class and lower-income lifestyles on social media.

@heykatieejay from the bottom of my heart, im so grateful for every single one of you that follow along here 🥺 i know money is a taboo topic, but if it helps anyone feel normalized that im just a normal person who struggles with nornal things, ill gladly continue keeping it real 🫶🏻 #realisticmomtiktok #workingmom #substituteteacher #motherhood #workingmomlife #minivlog #morningroutine #workingmommorningroutine #momonabudget #toddlermom #MomsofTikTok #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodunfiltered #realisticmomtok #realisticmomlife #realisticmomvlog #realmomlife #coffeetalk #homemaking #homemaker #morningroutine #morningcoffee #millennialmom #leowife #lawenforcementcommunity #inflation ♬ Meet You There (Instrumental) – The Young Ebenezers

“I used to think I couldn’t be a content creator because I don’t live in a pretty house, and I’m not aesthetic. I mean, look at me. My husband and I are just normal people who make just about enough money to get by every month,” mom of three Katie Ziemer posted on her TikTok account, heykatieejay, in a video that now has over 968,000 likes.

“The point of me really making this is to let you know if you live like this, too, you’re not alone, and you’re probably the majority. There are so many days and nights where I’m stressing. I’m praying for answers of how we’re going to pay for something. I know money is, like, a taboo topic. Times are so hard right now. I just wanted to share that because a lot of creators on here you see can afford a lot of really awesome things. I’m not one of those creators,” she added.

Some key and very relatable characteristics of unaesthetic content are smaller kitchens with brown cabinets (these are commonly found in rental apartments and homes) and messy counters and cabinets. Living room floors littered with toys are also a telltale sign of an unaesthetic mom video because, as any mom will tell you, cleaning up after kids is a 24/7 job, and moms don’t always have the time to do it.

Messy kitchen
Adobe

While many people prefer to show their best side on social media, these content creators are also embracing the “hot mess mom” label and are unafraid to post videos when they first wake up or videos with their hair in messy buns or while they’re wearing oversized shirts and sweats.

Watch a “day-in-the-life” video of an unaesthetic mom, and you might see her waking up at 5 a.m. to get breakfast ready for the kids while making a cup of coffee dressed in a robe or non-matching pajamas. Hot mess moms are also fine with admitting they allow their young kids to watch TV or have screen time while they take a nap on the couch or indulge in some “me” time.

MORE: Moms started the ‘Hot Mess Express’ to help other moms who feel overwhelmed

This is all in contrast to the “luxury mom” aesthetic, where videos are filmed in large, spotless, open spaces with earth-tone palettes. And if these moms are doing something as normal as waiting in the school pickup line, they’re decked out in glamorous clothes, camera-ready with their hair and makeup perfectly done.

The absurdity of the “luxury mom” aesthetic has made the push to normalize more realistic depictions of mom life one of the biggest trends in the parenting social media space in recent years.

@momlife_of1 #nonaestheticmom #relatablemom #averagemom #singleincomehousehold #sahmlife #sahmsoftiktok ♬ Normalize lower income homes – your plant bestie

“Can we please normalize lower-income homes? All I ever see on TikTok are big open spaces, bright lights, brand new houses, everything perfectly aesthetically pleasing. I want the kids to see this is normal, too. People still live like this,” said mom Alisha Ashour on her account @momlife_of1 in a video of her cleaning her home that has racked up over 24,000 likes.

The comments left on the video are equally relatable and enthusiastic:

“I agree. Seeing those perfect homes gave me anxiety because I felt like I needed that but I don’t. Happy in our little apartment,” said one commenter on Ashour’s video.

“Girl yes I don’t even have a dishwasher,” added another.

While aspirational mom content will always have a place on social media, unaesthetic mom content has made the internet a little less lonely for many moms. And that makes this viral trend one we can fully get on board with!

Family & Parenting, Home, Parenting, Viral
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About the Author
Margeaux Baulch Klein
Margeaux Baulch Klein is a freelance writer and digital strategist based in Los Angeles. She has written for publications like the Huffington Post, New York Daily News, Bustle, and HelloGiggles, among others.

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