Moms need Target. And, not just because they have the best selection of food pouches, $4 leggings and a whole aisle of Method cleaning products. It is that, but Target is also the one place we can go and be guaranteed to run into other moms.
No words are exchanged, but with a single look moms can say “I get you.” Just being there — with them, shopping around them — somehow makes motherhood less lonely.
When I moved to a new city a few years ago, Target was all I had some days. It’s the place I went to grab Starbucks and diapers and sanity. It was a safety blanket in my new home.
When I eventually made friends, joined activities and found parks, I tried to break up with Target — which I realize now is ridiculous. Our separation lasted only as long as my bottle of shampoo and I came crawling back with my Cartwheel App in hand.
I missed Target and all the women I had come to recognize. These moms are you and me and every last one of them is perfectly imperfect.
Smile at these eight types of moms the next time you are at Target.
1. The “I Just Need Out of the House” Mom
Maybe she needs sandwich bags and detergent, but what she really needs is a witness. This mom probably left breakfast dishes on the table, her hair is in a bun and one of her kids is missing a shoe.
She knew only one thing when she left the house and that is if she didn’t get out someone was going to lose it.
2. The Coupon Clipper Mom
You know her, you’d like to be her too. She’s slaying Cartwheel, scanning every item before she puts it in her cart — 5 percent, 10 percent, yay!
She doesn’t have to spend 15 minutes doing the math for all the “Buy 3, Get A $5 Gift Card” deals because she’s done her homework and has a clipped coupon to add to it. This mom is a REDcard-carrying super saver.
3. The “I’m Late For A Birthday Party” Mom
This mom is typically more dressed up than the yoga pant variety and will speed through Target in record time.
Her kids are standing in the cart, polished and shined up, and one of them is probably crying because the toy, gift bag and birthday card she just purchased isn’t for them — it’s for little Jack whose party starts in 5 minutes.
4. The “I’d Like to Buy These Empty Wrappers” Mom
It starts with coffee and chocolate milk, but soon this mom and her kids have eaten their way through every aisle — pouches, fruit snacks, goldfish.
She thinks, “No one has ever been as hungry as my toddler in Target” but takes solace as she passes my cart and realizes that it too is basically just a garbage can full of wrappers I need to buy.
5. The “I’m Just Here For the Coffee” Mom
The No. 1, 2 and 3 things on her shopping list are Starbucks, coffee, Starbucks. Let’s be real. This is everyone.
6. The Dollar Bin Diva Mom
She’s the mom in the dollar saver section who is buying all the things. She”ll take that pack of brown pencils, spool of ribbon and plastic flower and create some kind of Pinterest miracle. She’s prepared for any situation that requires tiny trinkets, bubbles and coloring books.
No road trip or plane ride is too long – her kids will have a trinket to open every 5 minutes because she owns the dollar section. Literally owns it … the whole thing.
7. The Bus Driver Mom
This mom has just discovered Target double carts are too big — just too damn big. She can’t get through a single aisle without bumping into something or someone. The look on her red, panting face says it all, “this is a whale, not a cart…and it should come with a permit and ‘Wide Right Turns’ sign.”
8. The “I Escaped!” Mom
She’s practically skipping down the aisles. Her kids are at school or with dad and she is at Target alone! This mom is slowly sipping her coffee, and leisurely strolling the aisle. She grabs a few necessities but her cart runneth over with makeup and bathing suits and decorative pillows. Why? Even she doesn’t know, and doesn’t care. She is at Target. All. By. Herself.
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