The Way A Woman Showers Vs. The Way A Man Showers
Taking a shower seems like a universal thing. I mean, we all do it. But, let me tell you—there are plenty of differences between the way a man and a woman take a shower. It’s almost as if we are from different planets or something…
Don’t believe me? Let me lay out the process for you:
- Takes off clothes and organizes them into different hampers. One for lights and one for darks.
- Steps on the scale. You can only weigh yourself when you’re naked, after all.
- Adjusts the water temperature just so and gets in the shower.
- Looks to her array of products and starts with the shampoo.
- Next, adds conditioner and pulls hair up into a bun because she read that helps prevent bumps along the back and the shoulders. All of that conditioner sitting on your skin for at least 15 minutes isn’t good.
- Washes body with a big, poofy loofah.
- Hums to herself.
- Carefully shaves legs, so as not to miss a single spot.
- Finally rinses out the conditioner.
- Thoroughly rinses sponge.
- Turns off water and sprays the shower with Tilex.
- Collects any hair from the drain.
- Towel-dries and wraps hair up in a second towel.
- Styles hair.
- Applies generous amounts of lotion before getting dressed again. This could take at least 20 minutes, depending on if she picked out her outfit ahead of time or not.
- Takes off clothes in the bathroom and leaves them in a pile on the floor.
- Turns the water on.
- Gets in, realizing it’s way to hot and adjusts the handle quickly.
- Reaches for 3-in-1 body wash, shampoo and conditioner (as if).
- Applies all over his body with his hands.
- Pees in the shower.
- Rinses soap off of hair, armpits and body.
- Turns the water off.
- Gets out of the shower, dripping all over the bathroom floor.
- Dries off, and drops towel to the floor with the rest of his clothes.
- Gets dressed in under five minutes.
See what I mean. I don’t know how guys do it. How can two shower processes differ so much? Just add it to the long list of differences between women and men, I suppose.